Blogosis

Hello, Hello Everyone-

For those of you who are reading from me for the first time, my name is Geoff Christ. I formerly hosted two separate blogs on LiveJournal (under the username “geoffizzle”) and a skateboarding blog with only one post at BlogSpot (Blog Name: “God Bless His Herpes”). If you haven’t already noticed, I’m not great at introducing myself, so I’ll try to keep the details minimal for this post.

I’m 21 years young as of the 24th of April this year, and as the skateboarding-blog-mention would point out, it is essentially my life in a box… or involving a box. I’m also a very dedicated gamer, and have been heavily influenced by so throughout my life. I graduated from Park Center Senior High in 2006 and spent a couple years at Saint Cloud State University; I’ll be finishing up at the University of Minnesota… long story short, transportation is not fun, and I didn’t want to put up with it another year at SCSU seeing as I’m a new driver.

I currently am facing an addiction with Taco Bell, so forgive me if I make a lot of references to how much I love cheesy gordita crunches and baja blast combinations in the future.

Ok, I’m tired of talking about myself- If you want to make friends with me personally, hit me up on the book of FACE… or Facebook for people who don’t follow funny all too well.

Geoff Christ’s Facebook

Looking over the topics available for me to post about, it seems like I’m gonna have a general focus on the gaming/sports stuff, but since my Homepage is set to Commondreams.org, I may as well link and perhaps put my thoughts out on some stuff that I find interesting in my future posts.

Feel free to hit me up with stuff you find out there in the internet world that I may not see. I generally lurk a lot of skateboarding websites, and my facebook is usually off the hook and open for business. Gaming sites are fun for me to look at, as well as lots of tech stuff, too. I’m a camera-guy, so if you see something that interests you that will likely interest me… HOLLA HOLLA HOLLA!

Peace,
Geoff

P.S. No, it’s not a typo, my last name is Christ, not like: “THAT GUY Christ,” just think: “Christmas but without the -mas,” and you have it.

I used to workat Valleyfair! when I lived in the United States. That was one long year I will never forget, despite how many times I try to forget. You might think free access to an amusement park is great, but they steal your soul as soon as you sign their contract. This comic surely helps me remember those times.

There were always sneaky little kids that would try these moves. I didn’t work rides much, but on several occasions at the Power Tower, we’d have kids 3 inches to short on their mommies 5 inch high heels thinking they’d strut their little ass on it. I don’t mind getting sued! Jump on and fly out!

I’d have to turn the little brats down where they would then cry to mommy, and mommy would scowl at me and cuss me out. I would wait for them to threaten me, and then call security. Security is another story, though. Hehe…

[via not from concentrate]

Ingenious criminal activity shouldn’t be seen as this heinous once they are caught. While this man is obviously wrong in his doings, we can’t help but sit back and have a nice laugh at what he was attempting.

A Milwaukee, WI (of course it happened in Wisconsin) has been arrested and charged with defrauding a restaurant as a habitual crime. His tactics included eating at “high-class” restaurants and then faking a heart attack to avoid the “high” bills.

Just how high class was this man eating? Applebee’s high! He racked up a shockingly expensive bill of 23 dollars after consuming a steak at the Milwaukee-located Applebee’s. He then faked a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital without leaving a cent behind. Oh yeah, this was his second faked attack. During the first faked heart seizure, he stumbled out of a taxi cab without owning up to the driver. I wonder why he didn’t drive him to the hospital…

Anyways, when he arrived at the hospital, a doctor recognized the man and knew he had been faking it, as he just saw him in the hospital a few weeks earlier. He was handed over to police.

After sentencing, this man could face up to nine months in jail with a $10,000 fine.

If you are going to bail out of paying a restaurant, at least do it at a place you can’t afford. Faking the heart attack is too risky, and not worth the time and needles at the hospital. I would suggest the “Oh, I left my wallet in the car” move. Works like a charm. This one is good for those who actually drive a car, though. For the others, there is the “ditch and run like the wind” tactic.

[via sfgate]

I can’t get enough of these silly Australians. They are funny, polite, and inteligable creatures. They also love Thailand, which is great. Most of them aren’t fat like the Americans that I see walking… stumbling around Kao-San Road with a 15 dollar prostitute hanging off of their side. Sometimes you get the oddity of an Aussie, though. This seems to be one such case.

A woman called into a Wales police station, saying she had spotted a stationary object in the crowd. Could it be a UFO she might be thinking.

Here’s the ‘999′ (emergency number of Australia) conversation:

Control: “South Wales Police, what’s your emergency?”

Caller: “It’s not really. I just need to inform you that across the mountain there’s a bright stationary object.”

Control: “Right.”

Caller: “If you’ve got a couple of minutes perhaps you could find out what it is? It’s been there at least half an hour and it’s still there.”

Control: “It’s been there for half an hour. Right. Is it actually on the mountain or in the sky?”

Caller: “It’s in the air.”

Control: “I will send someone up there now to check it out.”

Caller: “OK.”

An officer was sent to investigate. Here is the ending conversation with control and the officer:

Control: “Alpha Zulu 20, this object in the sky, did anyone have a look at it?”

Officer: “Yes, it’s the moon. Over.”

Either the lady that called in the “UFO” was messing with the police like Australians do, or she was just the rare idiot of society. Perhaps it was her first night she’d ever glanced outside her window, as the moon couldn’t have been there yesterday, could it have?

[via telegraph]

Poland has found a way to finally put those hobos to use. Unfortunately, they are dying in the process. I can’t help but feel for the above homeless man and his anger towards the evils of Polish doctors.

In order to test a possible vaccine for the bird flu, 3 doctors and 6 nurses headed into town and found a few homeless people. Being bribed with the equivalent of 3 dollars, they were stuck with a needle they were told contained a traditional flu vaccine.

While it is still “unknown” whether or not the leads of death are due to the vaccine, what the doctors have done here isn’t quite what I like to call humanitarian.

Poor bums. I hate needles, but these guys will do anything for a buck or two. I wish I could hire some of the hobos around Thailand to write for me. Unfortunately, the ones that speak English avoid my capture.

As for this story - this might not be the first time they’ve done tests on homeless men and women, though.

The medical staff, from the northern town of Grudziadz, are being investigated over medical trials on as many as 350 homeless and poor people last year, which prosecutors say involved an untried vaccine to the highly-contagious virus.

And then in Poland again:

In 2002, a number of ambulance medics were found guilty of killing their patients for commissions from funeral companies.

Oh, boy. Remind me never to go broke in Poland. I don’t want my intestines turned into some of their scrumptious sausage. Perhaps that is the secret ingredient.

[via telegraph]

This one is going to be a shocker for animal lovers. Looks like the tides have changed for our feathery friend, the heron. Rumor has it that we are screwing up or oceans and lakes so much that these birds just can’t take the taste of fish, or perhaps there just aren’t any left.

It is called natural adaption. The herons are taking whatever they can to feed themselves. In the case of this, heron chose cute bunny for lunch. Its a bit disturbing to see, but it is natural. Keep PETA out of this one. I don’t need their crap associates how evil these images are.

The heron was clever enough to drown the rabbit, first. That saves making a bloody, scratchy mess all over it’s beak. It also lubes the bunny up to fit down the herons neck. Bunnies aren’t fish covered in slimy, slippery type of mucus. That is pretty ingenious, actually. Adaptation at it’s best, truely.

Check out more images of the heron eating a rabbit below… if you can stomach it.

Running low on cash, but wealthy in gasoline gift cards? If you just don’t give a damn about them, why don’t you head down to Cincinnati and pick yourself up a hooker. This story tells the true tragedy of rising gas prices.

Police in Cincinatti (which is a little odd because the arrest report says it took place in Fort Wright, Ky.) are saying they picked up a hooker that accepts $100 dollar gas giftcards in exchange for a little ’sucky sucky’. Too bad! All I have is this $25 Shell card. Can I still get a quickie?

“When people are selling their bodies for gas, that’s pretty sad,” Ken Easterling, chief prosecutor in the Kenton County Attorney’s Office, told The Cincinnati Enquirer.

Sounds like the prosecutor can feel for girls that sell themselves for cash, but gas? That is just too low.

Meetings with the John and the prostitute were arranged via online ads? Google PPC? I wonder if they had a good ROI. The wonders of Google.

[via UPI]